Perry Bible Fellowship — Matched

Matched
http://pb_fellowship.livejournal.com/88325.html

So, I saw this post this morning… and oh boy. A Reform Jewish prawn-looking/werewolf answering an ad for a lycanthrope with a lobster head (and now thinking about it, he does look more like a lobster).

Seriously, though, Perry Bible Fellowship pushes almost as many boundaries as The Onion, but I don't even know about this one.

OMGosh, The Dreaded Red Arrow

I grew up in Florida. In Florida there really wasn't a problem with turning right in red arrows directing right turns, so long as one was in the rightmost lane.

I move to Georgia, and I was a bit cautious at first, never turning, even if people would blow their horns at me or flash their headlights.

Then I'd started to buckle, starting to turn. I'd learnt tonight I've been contravening the law.

In Florida:

What does the red arrow mean?
A red RIGHT arrow means that you must come to a complete stop at the marked stop line or before moving into the crosswalk or intersection. After stopping, you may turn RIGHT on the red arrow at most intersections if the way is clear. Some intersections display a "NO TURN ON RED" sign, which you must obey.
A red LEFT turn arrow means that you must come to a complete stop at the marked stop line or before moving into the crosswalk or intersection, and shall remain stopped until a signal indication to proceed is shown. After stopping, the motorist facing a red LEFT turn arrow or red circular signal indication is permitted to enter the intersection to turn left from a one-way street onto a one-way street with traffic moving to the left except when a " NO TURN ON RED" sign is displayed.

(FAQs) - Traffic Signals - Florida Department of Transportation

In Georgia:

GA § 40-6-21.  Meaning of traffic signals

...

      (F) Traffic, except pedestrians, facing a steady RED ARROW signal may not enter the intersection to make the movement indicated by such arrow and, unless entering the intersection to make such other movement as is permitted by other indications shown at the same time, shall stop at a clearly marked stop line or, if there is no stop line, before entering the crosswalk on the near side of the intersection or, if there is no crosswalk, before entering the intersection, and shall remain standing until an indication to make the movement indicated by such arrow is shown;

      (G) Unless otherwise directed by a pedestrian signal, pedestrians facing a steady RED ARROW signal shall not enter the roadway; and

      (H) Traffic, except pedestrians, facing a flashing RED ARROW signal, after stopping as provided in subparagraph (A) of this paragraph, may make a right turn but shall stop and remain stopped for pedestrians and yield the right of way to other traffic proceeding as directed by the signal at such intersection.

...

O.C.G.A. § 40-6-21

Oh, boy…

Smart Stages: Really Smart?

	Kristopha Hohn (@seishin17)
10/12/14, 10:18 AM I can see how the smart stages chair might be a complicated toy around potty training time. pic.twitter.com/UbUkvsl0Xv

Commercial, US Version: http://youtu.be/udG7KTD0E4w

Commercial, UK Version: http://youtu.be/bpQbj4e7oIo

So, I'd seen this commercial for the Fisher Price Smart Stages Chair, and at first I'd thought it was a potty. Then they'd started speaking and I'd realized it was a learning and interaction chair.

I think it's just confusing to a child.

Betsy Randolph Shouldn't Have Access to A Time Machine Ever

Betsy Randolph remembers run-in with warehouse suspect
http://m.koco.com/news/betsy-randolph-remembers-runin-with-warehouse-suspect/28277510

So, she regrets she couldn't have done more and feels she could have averted a tragedy. She's expressed her innermost feelings on the public record, and those thoughts probably should have remained inside.

Those thoughts and feelings are those of a hurt and grieving woman, yes, but she's also a law enforcement official. One shouldn't have to think, as I am now, that should there be a time machine that one would have to hold her in custody because we'd worry she would alter the timeline to relieve the guilt she feels.

She would kill him because she knows what he has done now, but that's still not a responsible thing to say in her position.

IS/Islamic State/ISIS/ISIL?

We've been hearing about them almost incessantly for the better part of the year. They'd seemingly started calling themselves the Arabic equivalent of ISIS, and then later "decided" to call themselves instead Islamic State, reasons in the news being they're exerting independence and individuality apart from Syria, the Levant, and Iraq.

Some media outfits, like Deutsche Welle, Al Jazeera, and elements of the BBC, had followed suit and called them IS or "the Islamic State group", still acknowledging some still call them ISIS or ISIL. I've never quite understood concretely why some elect to call them one way or another.

American news outlets like CNN and Fox News still predominately call them ISIS, and I think it may be partly because the US government in general still calls them that as well.

Is it perhaps to deny them the "satisfaction" of hearing people address them with the name they wish people to call them? I wouldn't doubt that's a probability, but there hasn't seemed to be any discussion on that. It's also seemed there are some who had gotten so used to calling them ISIS, or ISIL, that they just continue calling them that since all of it is generally coterminous.

It reminds me of something else I'd brought up in the past about maps that showed Crimea as still part of Ukraine rather than, at the least, showing it as a disputed area that happened to have had a referendum deciding to cede themselves to Russia.

I believe they should do both, at the very least, much like Deutsche Welle has done ("the Islamic State, also called ISIS"). That seems to be the fairest thing in my view.

Literally

I'd just had a dream where we were discussing literal versus figurative speech and it was actually pretty funny.

One character was saying, “I've known people who've never said anything literally. One day I said to one of them, ‘Go sit on your dick and take a picture , 'cause *fuck you*.’ And he comes the next day like, ‘I'm really sorry, I'd tried but I just couldn't get it up there.’ And then he hands me a picture of him trying it.”

[WTF face]

My dreams are weird, I know.

Bill's Excellent (Yacht) Adventure

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/i-m-on-a-boat--bill-gates-vacations-on--330m-yacht-193011058.html

The New York Daily News captured some photos of Gates aboard "The Serene," a $330 million dollar yacht that Gates and his family are renting for $5 million per week. The Russia-born Scheffler is an interesting figure himself, famous for battling with Russian President Vladimir Putin, who tried to nationalize and "redistribute" Stolichnaya's wealth. According to Business Insider, Serene is the third most expensive yacht in the world.

And I'd thought Bill Gates was giving a majority of his wealth to his and his wife's foundation. It's like, when I'd heard he was vacationing on this behemoth, it disenchanted me some.

He could very well have enough to do both the foundation and "splurge" on this, but it's still a wonder if he could do more.

Then again, should he do more? Would doing more make the beneficiaries of the foundation become more dependent on it?

The Digital ID "Revolution"

Estonia will hand out digital ID cards to non-residents
http://www.engadget.com/2014/06/29/estonia-digital-id-for-non-residents/?ncid=rss_truncated

Every time I hear about Estonia and it's forwardness with basically all things technology and the government, it actually doesn't frighten me. I've been a person who's said "I have nothing to hide". There are things I don't talk about openly, yes, but for things especially regarding government laws and rules, I just don't play.

I've talked about/ranted about people not obeying traffic rules, and things like that in what people may call "government overreach" I see as perhaps people just not wanting the government to catch them doing what they should not be.

This is, at least, some of the time.

I'm actually thinking about getting a one of these digital IDs, partly for the sake of being a giant nerd, and partly just to make the point people make out "privacy" to be so much more of a big deal than it really should be.

Racism, Insensitivity, or The Way They Are?

	Stitcher (@Stitcher)
6/18/14, 8:55 PM Is Univision's World Cup commentary racist? via @NPR stitcher.com/s?eid=34422976… #WorldCup2014

Being a Black person, I've encountered the various ways Spanish-speakers can refer to me, and the invariably non-PC way they refer to all Asians as chinos even though they may now where they're actually from and how to refer to them.

Some say the way they're talking is them being playful, like the various nicknames they give people like gordo, flaca, or morenito, but I definitely see the point of calling the players these "nicknames" or monikers instead of their names.

They should have more professionalism, though, regardless of eighteen-hour shifts.

Grab Your Big Pouch

http://youtu.be/_-fOJgsUEPU

I had seen this commercial on live TV maybe only twice, but on Internet streaming it's popped up a little more. 

Every time I see it, I think a few things:

1) This Big Pouch Man character is quirky and pretty attractive. When he's upside-down you don't see it, but the moment he uprights himself in the back seat, you can see it, especially in the eyes.

2) His character is also kind of creepy. It almost seems they're making double-entendres with the product. This is fine, and I'd giggled. Simultaneously, is the character of the driving test guy supposed to be a teenager or an adult still living with mum? Perhaps it's that California's driving test age is

18, in which case it's "fine"?

3) The creepiness is kind of hot. 

Because the commercial is just barely kind of edgy, that might be why it's not gotten as much airtime, seemingly, on live television, but I'm glad for the Internet and it's archival of human creation, destruction, and weirdness.

Translation Woes

The Best Translation Ever.

http://www.tickld.com/funny/t/841598

This is why one should beware translation requests. That's been a peeve of mine, sometimes. If I want to know what something says and I don't know the language, I seek out the tools to try translating it, not go asking what something says.

Did this person learn nothing in elementary school?!

Catching Fire

The Onion Reviews 'The Hunger Games: Catching Fire'
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kyx1U9QjWVQ

I'd seem this *weeks* ago and found it funny, partly because it's reasonably honest and true in its sentiments:

1) Josh Hutcherson is kind of adorable, but there are others who are stereotypically more "worthy" of lead guy.

2) There's quite a bit of eye candy in the movie, it seems (as I've not seen it myself).

3) This is the view most of the Catching Fire audience will have, or at least what they're looking for when watching the movie.

It's still hilarious, regardless of how much analysis one does on it.

Goodluck Jonathan, Style Magnate

It wasn't until this Nigerian schoolgirl/#BringBackOurGirls crisis that I'd ever really seen press footage of Goodluck Jonathan, the often-criticized Nigerian president who'd won somewhat substantially in a re-election campaign a few years ago.

I subscribe to the BBC's Africa Today podcast, and so have heard about him and heard his voice somewhat frequently, but I'd never taken the time to look up what he looks like. Partly it's because the majority of African leaders haven't fit my viewing æsthetic historically, but it's just never come up.

So, one day I'm watching the news and I see this fedora-ed dude walking alongside François Hollande and I think, "Does he dress like this all the time???".

The answer, it seems, is yes. Is the majority of Google Image search results I'd called up (including the one above), he is wearing about that same hat. There are a few with him not wearing it as well, and he actually looks better without it.

My question is, then, why? Why does he wear it? Is he like his predecessors and comrades-at-arms in other African nations who've done things because they think they look good even though they fall — often quietly, sometimes publicly — in the ridicule of their people for these faux pas of fashion?

Perhaps this is worth some research. It may even be in his Wikipedia entry…

… after looking up …

Alas, no dice. But his wife's name is Patience. How interesting.

Semen… Cupcakes…

	Complex (@ComplexMag)
5/5/14, 5:50 PM California teen gave semen-filled cupcakes to classmates who were dicks to her: cmplx.it/1mwiB08

Now, apparently according to astrological personality charts, Scorpios are supposed to be the most revenge-driven. This made me think, though… This is a bit much, although I wonder how dastardly these "victims" had to be to get semen in their cupcakes.

What's more, I'm wondering how she got the semen. Was this a relative; a (very good) friend? Did she add the "spice" to her cupcakes after baking, or does she have baking materials that are now kind of biohazards?

#shivering

Nametag It

It's not the first time I've wondered, but I've been wondering when television commercial producers had decided to start putting nametags visibly on their characters, or even giving the characters names in-commercial (like Maxwell the Pig).

The first one I really remember paying attention to is Annie from Popeye's Louisiana Chicken, and from there it's been everything from Matt of Carmax to these new commercials (of I forget which car company) where they have splash screens of the characters' names when they've completed the obstacle course of supposed "hard customers".

This comes to me because, partly, I wear a nametag at work and partly because I – based on apparent work standards – have to "introduce" myself to every customer. I can't help wondering if this is a change that had occurred — if at all — around the same time commercial characters started getting names. I can sort of get it as far as those characters go, since, I suppose, those that do have names are in a sequence of commercials either in format or in "storyline".

Logically, it's begun to make sense for me too, the self-introduction (though it's so intensely contrary to my self-effacingness most of the time): when you come back, you know me as more than just the ugly, big-headed, Spanish-speaking burnt-Black dude in glasses. At the same time, the vast majority of the people I deal with don't (seem to) come back due to their being transient, or if they do it's either I've not dealt with them sequentially or I've just forgotten them completely.

I suppose it's partly an exercise to get me to like myself more. Who knows?

Welcome: my name is Kris and I'm here to assist you today.

Tax Day Honesty

I'd seen this weeks ago, but it's only appropriate to post this today, being the United States' Tax Day.

I'd discovered Pearls Before Swine through my My Yahoo! page and it's been quite giggleful, actually. This one made me think, though, because a lot of people kind of have this mindset: "me make lots monee" but "guvmint you no geet any".

Yes, there are cases of government overreach, mismanagement, and perhaps at times overregulation. People don't seem to realize the things they take for granted their taxes pay for, though…

So, pay your taxes, and vote to make sure management of taxes happens properly.

Banned Names

Is your name now 'banned' in Saudi Arabia?: http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/middle-east/is-your-name-now-banned-in-saudi-arabia-9192298.html

Okay, so this isn't my first parade. I'd gone over articles that talked about Finland's moratorium on certain names (mostly ridiculous ones), but with Saudi Arabia it seems they're doing it more out of a sense of trying to be pious rather than being sensical. That doesn't surprise me anyway, since Saudi Arabia has always been piety central (though it doesn't always do it with the best results).

The reason this article had even come to my attention was one of my Armenian-American friends has a name which, by this list, would not be acceptable. It's always an interesting look at how the rest of the world regulates things.

[accent]Stupid Americans[/accent]

Piers Morgan and CNN Plan End to His Prime-Time Show
http://www.nytimes.com/2014/02/24/business/media/piers-morgan-and-cnn-plan-end-to-his-prime-time-show.html

Okay, yes, I'm bi-national. I'm a British Citizen who received his US naturalization in 2006. I've grown up in the United States primarily, and being an anthropologist have observed all the little things that make United States Americans proud and whatnot, as well as what leaves others wanting more.

This, however, is an example of that. Americans don't want to accept anything that makes them think about anything other than the United States except for when it's convenient, trendy, or what "everyone else" is doing. So, when Piers Morgan confronts them obliquely, debating as he does or, apparently as this article states, doesn't cover what "Americans want to hear", shutting him down is a problem.

Accepting that shutting him down because he runs his show the way he does and that "everyone" flees to other networks because of that is a problem. Full disclosure: I've never watched Piers Morgan Tonight. I've never been one for talk shows period, so pretty much any of them I've stayed away from, daytime or primetime. I, therefore, have no idea if the show is (or was) any good. My judgment lies solely with the article's claims. I'd like to believe my knee-jerk feelings have some merit, though: Americans on a majority do not want to hear about things that make them change their minds.

This is sad. This is why this country is so messed-up, and this is why it makes me smile sometimes when other countries put this one in its place. The United States' priorities skew completely waywardly most of the time, and yet it expects the rest of the world to bend over and take it whenever it wants a piece. If Piers Morgan helped the United States in some part during his tenure to see that there are things beyond being the third-largest country (debatably) and the third most populous, that there are people dying *everywhere* while the majority of US residents were in their homes watching a bunch of people vie for twoish-pound pieces of metal medallions, then bully for him.

Yes, there are other countries, mostly European, that just about force their naturalized denizens to become French (or Italian, or German, or whatever) culturally and shun them if they don't adapt and make 100% a part of them all the trappings of Frenchness just as this article asserts CNN and the viewing public expected of Piers Morgan. If the United States is such a world leader, then shouldn't it lead with the example that some Britain-born dude on a US prime time show can be what he is, and shouldn't we "enlightened" Americans accept him for it? Yes, it's ratings. Yes, this is idealistic.

But this is why this country is filled with stupid people. 

Risk of Positivity

Craig Davis sentenced to 10 years
http://www.myfoxatlanta.com/story/24788331/craig-davis-sentanced-to-10-years

You know, this really kind of gets to me. This is the second high-profile-ish "I-have-HIV/AIDS-but-I'm-going-to-sleep-around-anyway-and-btw-I'm-straight-identifying" trial that's gone on in this state since 2014 broke.

It's pretty angering, actually, because… well, okay. The supposed Bareback Brotherhood — and sorry if it ruffles feathers bringing it up — does this all the time, and I think the defense I've heard is that if people want to go around doing this at he risk of infection it's their business (For those who don't know, that group is a bunch of loosely-affiliated group of mostly gay and bisexual men who'd been rather vocal in 2010-ish on the Internet, who eschew condom use during anal sex under any conditions. The backlash to them has been strong that I think that's why I only hear ably them sporadically nowadays.). They at least seem to understand it's a risk and thus announce their beliefs and lifestyle openly (sometimes with blissful ignorance) that others might understand (or "understand") and act accordingly. 

With this case, though, these poor women, they not only could get infected themselves, but because they're women they could become pregnant, bringing something akin to what happens in a lot of the developing world — because it's almost they don't know better— to the United States. It brings the fear, hate, and uncertainty hundreds of thousands of women primarily in Kenya, Uganda, Tanzania, and South Africa feel to the United States.

And then somehow, I think these guys do this because they may have some homosexual hangups like a lot of Black guys have: go sleeping around because they want to prove they're "not gay". And sure, they might not be. They might be intravenous drug users and sharing. They may have caught it, as low as the odds are, from an HIV-positive woman and kept "sharing the joy".

An argument for chemical castration.

I don't know what goes through these guys' heads if anything does, but they've got to stop. But then, maybe some of the women knew and it's a straight version of BBBH?

Radio Show Hoaxes

http://shar.es/QLWxZ

New York-area radio hosts apologize for fabricating story about a pair of gay dads who were chastized over young daughter's birthday party invitation

16 FEBRUARY 2014 | BY SYLVIA TAN

You know, part of me wants to blame the radio station. Why, for ratings, would you make something like this up? How long do you let it go on before saying "Well, this isn't real."

Simultaneously, how much research do the outraged do before initiating backlash and making it more than what it really is?

Taking in The Foreign Content

This half-season of two shows I like, Teen Wolf and Supernatural, decided to take different tacks than what I've known them to do: they've taken elements of foreign mythologies and made plot points out of them.

And for some reason, while I'd enjoyed that fact, it felt a little weird at first. Thinking about that underlying reaction, I had to reflect about that because I also happen to be a somewhat-passionate anime fan. Anime, the animated Japanese-originate phenomenon, often borrows elements from non-Japanese and Japanese mythology and history (often the former) to drive their stories, and it's never felt odd.

One of my favorite anime series is Digimon, and there are thousands of digimon that have names coming from all kinds of sources. For example, you have Sakuyamon, coming from Japan, Wolfmon (pronounced 'vollfmon'), from Germany, and Shinduramon, from India. Another favorite series, The Big O, borrows highly in style and feel from the American cartoon Batman: The Animated Series. Yet with Teen Wolf, bringing in kitsune, oni masks, and demon warriors into the werewolf and coyote spirit mix, and Supernatural having in its most recent episode a Peruvian/Andean beast called a pishtaco, it felt weird for the first couple seconds hearing it.

Might it have been because Teen Wolf and Supernatural, for the majority of their histories, have used United States-based (more or less) creatures, beasts, and myths? That's more than likely probable. Bringing in other bits so late into the game might have been a little jarring, though the anthropology major in me jumps for joy at the chance to learn different aspects of other culture's artefacts and how American writers use them in their creations as much as learning that one of the Pokémon, Ooper, looks like the Mexican amphibian the axolotl.

It might be as well that one's imagination can accept animated series bringing in other myths more easily than a series with human actors. I suppose I should stay tuned to see what other shows I like start importing things, especially the live action ones. 

Exciting stuff!